Question: My Mom and I don't exactly see eye to eye. Our latest dispute is over game ratings. For Christmas this year, I got an Xbox 360 console. I have been playing games such as “Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2” and “Halo” at my friends’ houses for at least four years, since I was about ten years old. Now, there is a heavy dispute over which games I am allowed to play. Should I not be allowed to play games that are rated Mature just because the label says so, or should I be allowed to play M-rated games because I have already been playing them for years?

-- Elias

Answer:

Hi Elias,

Good question! Video game ratings are a very helpful guide to deciding which games are okay for you to play, but these decisions aren’t the same for every family or every teen, so it’s important to get on the same page with your mom.

I recommend sitting down and having an open conversation about the games you like to play and why you like to play them. While she may not always agree with your game choices, having a two-way dialogue is the best way to help your mom become more comfortable with the games you’d like to play. You can even fill out a PACT with her to get the conversation started. But before you start the discussion, you need to develop your case. What are the ratings and why were they awarded to "Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2" or "Halo"? Was it adult content or violence or explicit language? The more you understand the ratings, the better this conversation will go. Why do you think it’s okay for you to play these games, even if the ratings are “mature.” Be prepared to answer that question or address it when you present your case.

Here are a few tips to help you and your mom come to a decision about what types of games are appropriate for you to play:

• Review the content of each game together to reach a decision about what’s right for you and your family. Explain the story behind the game to your mom. That helps her see the mature rating items in context, instead of thinking the game is too mature for you.  Rent the game and review it together before you buy it, or borrow your friend’s copy.

• Play video games with your mom. Not only is it a great way to bond over something that interests you, but it will give her a deeper understanding of the games you like to play. Even if it turns out that she isn’t a big fan of "Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2" or "Halo", she may enjoy other games with you. Find some you will both enjoy.

• If she wants more information about game ratings or a particular game, encourage her to read ESRB’s ratings summaries and content descriptors to learn more about the rating categories and that game’s content. The more she understands about the context, though, the better she will be able to understand whether it’s right for you or not.

The more you can impress your mom with how much you know and that you have given thought to what is right for you and why, the more she is likely to trust you in helping her select the right games and other media for you. This approach shows that you are “mature” enough to make your case, and maybe “mature” enough for these games.

Just remember that media choices are different for every household – so games that might be acceptable at your friend’s house may not be given the ok-to-play by your family. And there’s nothing wrong with that. They may also be different for different children in your family. As long as you and your mom maintain an open dialogue about what’s appropriate, you’ll be able to have smarter gaming guidelines together that you can stick to in the long-run.

Have fun and good luck!
 

Virtually every video game for sale or rental in the U.S. carries an ESRB rating. An age rating category on the front of the package recommends what age the game is best suited for, and content descriptors on the back indicate the type of content that may have triggered the rating assigned or may be of interest or concern to you. Using the ESRB ratings is a great first step in making informed choices, but the ratings are only that…a first step. 

Rating summaries are matter-of-fact descriptions of the context and relevant content that factored into a game’s rating, with an emphasis on elaborating on the content descriptors. ESRB created a new mobile website at m.esrb.org so that parents can look up rating summaries right from the video game store, where the decision about whether or not to buy a game is most likely to be made. Parents can also find rating summaries before they go shopping by searching for game titles on ESRB’s website at www.esrb.org, by using ESRB’s rating search widget, or by signing up for a free bimonthly e-newsletter called ParenTools that offers a list of recently rated titles complete with rating summaries and customized to their preference of rating categories and game platform.